Wednesday, June 22, 2005

DVD Review: Memorial Day

As if watching Boogeyman wasn't bad enough, I then have to submit myself through this hunk of crapola. It's times like these I really wonder why I love this genre so much. For starters, you see on the cover, that guy that looks amazingly like Jason Voorhees? Yeah, he's not even in this movie, the killer here wears an ugly kabuki mask. Oh yeah, do you see that huge machete he's holding like Jason Voorhees? Yeah, it's not in the movie either. "But Dave, what IS in the movie?" I hear you asking. My answer would have to be "Oh, dear reader, there's ALOT in this here movie, ALOT of crappy acting by ALOT of ugly actors saying ALOT of crappy dialogue, so much so that it made me run to the bathroom ALOT of times!". Let's see if this plotline sounds familiar. Many years ago, a group of friends go camping at Memorial Lake, one girl brings her retarted brother. Suddenly, all the campers are too drunk to know and the boy DROWNS. Then, many years later, they return to the campground, albiet on the other side of the lake, and they start getting killed in terrible ways (I meant to say "terribly boring ways"). If you see this movie on your video store's shelf, run the other way! I mean it! This movie gets 0 out of *****.

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