CD of the Month (November): Werewolf Order by Shadow Reichenstein

Got his little black beauty in my mailbox the other day and haven't stopped listening to it since. An unbelievable piece of horror-rock if there ever was one. The songs are crisp and perfectly produced. Shadow does an incredible job of summoning Bela Lugosi. It's about time Halloween got its own music and It's Halloween is the perfect tune for it. The lyrics are ghoulishly fun with the music a little harder here than on their last cd. My only beef is that they included an updated version of a song (Be My Victim) from their debut. A minor snag in an otherwise perfect coffin lining. ****1/2 out of *****.

Movie Review: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Despite all of the things left out from the book, this is still the best one of the lot. Plenty of action, intrigue and eye-candy for any movie fan. Harry's getting older and so are his freinds so there's plenty of hormonal problems going on here. Throw in the Tri-Wizard Tournament and the return of Voldemort and we've got ourselves a winner. Beautifully directed, wonderfully acted and perfectly scored, this movie keeps you going well past the two-hour mark. The absolute greatest thing about this franchise is the fact that they keep the same actors for the same roles, something that's rarely done. They are also able to snag some really great actors for the bit parts. Order of the Pheonix just can't get made quick enough! Highly recommended. ****1/2 out of *****.

DVD Review: The Gingerdead Man

That's it! Call the coroner and toe-tag me, I'm dead! Full Moon Studios have put out some bad films over the years, but this one takes the cookie. From a studio that can make masterpieces (Subspecies, Castle Freak) when they want to, this is just a bad, bad movie. Not even Gary Busey's thespian masterwork can save it. Didn't he get nominated for an Oscar once? Oh how low we fall, first Celebrity Fit Club and now The Gingerdead Man! Busey plays a killer who goes to the electric chair and happens to return from the dead as a killer cookie. That's all you need to know, the rest of the story doesn't mean a thing. If Charles Band wants to save his company, he'd better hire Ted Nicolau back and put out some higher quality stuff. 0 out of *****. And I'm a die-hard Full Moon fan!

DVD Review: Jack O'Lantern

What did I do to deserve this? I watched this crapper over Halloween weekend and it took me this long to write a review about it. You see, I've been in the toilet throwing my guts up and gouging my eyes out since then! Never before have I seen someone die by being run off the road, and hitting ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. The front end is smashed up and there's ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in front of the damn thing. Anyway, the result of the ghost wreck is the dad is killed and the son is left brain damaged. Then a mysterious pumpkin is left on the boy's porch and when he goes to carve it, there's blood in it and somehow he gets possessed by something and he turns into a big pumpkin man, or something like that. It's even more funny watching the making of because everyone is saying how great the movie is. They must have been high. Another one of these and I just may kill myself! 0 out of *****.

DVD Review: Blue Demon

Holy Mama, simply put, Blue Demon is one of the lousiest movies I've ever had the displeasure of watching! For everyone that reads my reviews, you know that's really saying something because I watch some stinkers! A scientific team creates a group of "smarter and deadlier" great white sharks that they're able to control, all of them except a particular nasty one called "red dog". Never mind the fact that just about everyone that comes into contact with these man-eaters are able to walk away before they get attacked! There's only 3 deaths in this entire crapfest! Oh yeah, the sharks escape the laboratory, oh no look out, blah blah blah. Included in this masterful piece of crap is a stunning performance by Jeff Fahey (by stunning, I mean laughably bad). Forget the sharks, this movie will kill you! 0 out of *****.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Just a note to let you know some new reviews will be up very soon. Some of the DVD titles are Blue Demon, Jack-O-Lantern, Werewolf Hunter and a few others. Don't forget to keep an eye out for the November CD of the month. It's been a tough choice this month, but I think I have a winner, so stay tuned. Other than that, thanks for the nice words about the site, don't eat too much turkey and Stay Scared!

P.S.-Don't forget, the Davies are right around the corner and the list of nominees is shaping up nicely, they'll be posted next month!

DVD Review: Boo

Finally, another competitor for a Davey comes out of the woodwork. For a B-movie, Boo is a very atmospheric and well acted spookfest. The story takes place in an old abandoned hospital where the ghosts are extremely active on the third floor. On Halloween night, a group of kids plan to wander the halls of the place in hopes to scare their girlfriends. One of their other buddies went in ahead to set up some props, only thing is, this place don't need no stinking props! Add in a cop looking for some other kids that were missing, a loaded gun and the ever present Dee Wallace Stone, and you've got a gripper! The main evil spook wants to leave the hospital and can only do it in a human body, so paranoia sets in as the characters begin to wonder who's human and who's not. Nicely directed, I give Boo **** out of *****.

DVD Review: House of Wax

The latest incarnation of the House of Wax horror movies is a hard one for me to review. I thought it was decent, but on the other hand, I kept nodding off while trying to watch it. I don't know if I was just over-tired or maybe the movie's not as good as I thought it was. I may have to watch it again to be sure. On the good hand, it had a few jumpy parts, the acting was solid enough and the sound was good. On the bad hand, it was slow to get moving early on, Chad Michael Murray is extremely annoying in it, and after the slow beggining, it still plodded along in other parts. I won't bother with the plot, it's a house of wax movie, you can figure it out. For now, I'll give it **1/2 out of *****.

DVD Review: Land of the Dead

The latest zombie flick from the man that invented the genre, George A. Romero is a pleasant surprise. I had heard alot of disappointing things about it so I was wondering how bad it was going to be. Well, not bad, not bad at all. Romero tells a fresh rendition of the zombie flick where the zombies actually start to regain some type of thought control back over their bodies. The world is overrun with the dead and a caged-in city is the only safe haven. The city is divided into a class system with only the rich getting the goods and the lower class citizens living on the streets, hey just like real life! Eventually, the zombies get tired of the humans coming out into their world and killing them and taking supplies for the big city. It's time for a revolt! the zombies are able to think on a barely-there level, but just enough to get by, almost like they were modeled after George Bush, but with a little more smarts. Romero does an effective job of portraying his behind-the-scenes social commentary which I think is about social status and racism. Nicely directed with plenty of gut ripping, I give Romero's latest **** out of *****.

DVD Review: The Hollow

Nothing like a good old Headless Horseman movie on a chilly October night, oh, can anybody recommend one to me cause this one ain't it. Not unless you like your Horseman riding around with a gigantic rubber pumpkin on his head. This thing was more like a watermelon than a pumpkin! And when he rode, the damn thing was bobbing this way and that! It looked ridiculous. And to boot, the rider was never headless like on the cover, he always had the melon on his head. The fact that Nick Carter gets the lead billing tells you something about this one too. He plays a tough kid so that also tells you a little about the casting. The plot is basically this-Icabod Crane escaped the Horseman the first time round and now his ancestor (Kevin Zegers) must face the reemerging threat of the Horseman. Stacey Keach was at least entertaining as the graveyard keeper but can someone please get Judge Reinhold a decent haircut! Kaley Cuoco from TV's Eight Simple Rules was no better than Carter in the acting department. Just too many things working against this one--**1/2 out of *****.

DVD Review: Sin City

Frank Miller's cult comic hit comes to the movie screen with Robert Rodriguez directing. Sounds like a match made in heaven, sometimes yes and sometimes no. There's just too much going on in this movie. It's comprised of three seperate yet intertwining stories. Each story was good enough for it's own movie and yet they had to be squashed down to all fit within one movie. The direction is stunning with the black and white with certain things colored look. The movie was a visual treat to watch but the way the stories were combined took away from an otherwise good film. Mickey Rourke was fantastic as Marv, he was the highlight of the movie and his story was the best. Given that, the movie as a whole gets *** out of *****.

New Award Show!!

The year is rapidly coming to a close and we all know what's coming don't we? No, not Christmas! It's THE DAVEY'S!! Forget about the Oscars, the Emmys, the eleven award shows on MTV, Peoples Choice Awards, Billboard Awards, and others that don't even deserve mentioning. There's only ONE award that's worth getting and that's a DAVEY! In the upcoming months, I'll be doing some true soul searching to try to figure out exactly who deserves this truly prized award. I'll be picking the very best in the following catagories: Best CD, Best Direct-to-DVD film, Best Novel, Best Television Show and maybe if I have the time, I'll pick best actors and actresses or some junk like that. Julia Roberts won't win, I'll tell you that! And Russell Crowe can stay home! This is for the REAL hard working people in show business, the people who get hardly no exposure or credit. Not the pampered poohbahs like George Clooney and his gaggle of bought freinds! Stay tuned, the list of candidates will be up eventually. Unlike the other awards, I give people the entire year to make the list so if a film comes out on December 31st, it's still in contention for this year's award. Not long after the New Year, the winners will be revealed and some people will rejoice and have a great year and unfortunately, some will cry out and fall into a bottomless pit of self loathing and hatred, but so it goes in the brutal world of entertainment. Until next time, rent the movies I recommend, listen to the CD's of the month and by god, don't watch Snapped!!

CD of the Month (October): Dark Light by HIM

The leaves are piling up on the ground, the sky is overcast, a chill wind blows and all around the skeletons and ghouls of Halloween are playing in the yards. Perfect time of year for HIM to release their latest disc. All the moodyness and poetic madness is in full effect on Dark Light. Every song has references to the grave, death and/or love as is usual from Ville Vallo and gang. I don't understand how certain bands get overexposure (My Chemical Romance, Good Charlotte, etc.) and some, better bands don't get any. HIM has been consistently putting out some great music over the last few years and I see alot of merchandise in Hot Topic but I never hear them on the radio or see them on TV. I think that may change with this release. Every song is radio freindly and I can't see them not getting some exposure this year. From the Exorcist-style opening of "Vampire Heart" to the final refrains of "In the Nightside of Eden", Ville takes us on a ten song trip through the graveyards of love. Recommended, even if you aren't a ghoul with a broken heart. ****1/2 out of *****.

DVD Review: Satan's Little Helper

Just in time for Halloween, a film that takes place on Halloween. How can you refuse to rent a movie with this kind of cover art? Satan's Little Helper is chock full of dispicable acts of various brutality. No one is safe here, not the blind man, the pregnant woman, the baby in the carriage, not even the cat! The film is about a little boy who's obsessed with his new video game called "Satan's Little Helper". He then sets out on Halloween to find the real Satan and become his helper. "Satan" here being a ruthless killer in a scary mask, he delights in taking the boy from murder to murder enlisting him to even lure some victims. I have to tell you, the little boy really makes this movie. This is a well directed and acted B-movie that really deserves an audience. It's more of a black comedy/horror mix than a straight out horror movie. Amanda Plummer plays the boys mother and after the first act, she gives a good performance. I recommend this film, it's more of a treat than a trick. **** out of *****.

DVD Review: The Amityville Horror (2005)

With The Fog remake hitting theaters this friday, and with the scores of horror remakes looming on the horizon, it's no surprise that horror re-do's (or as they say in the biz--re-imaginings) are a new hot commodity. Michael Bay started the craze with the success of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake and the new version of Dawn of the Dead only fanned those flames. Bay's next re-do is The Amityville Horror. While not a bad film, I feel that it didn't have the effect of the original. Now, I don't mean that the original is scarier by comparison, I mean that at the time the original was released, it had a much more of a horrific feel to it. If you watch the original today, it's almost laughable, but at the time...oohhh, spooky! And that's what you don't really get with the remake, the feel. It was well directed and acted with Ryan Reynolds giving a surprisingly good performance. By now, we all are familiar with the true story of the Lutz family, so I won't rehash it here. I still wonder how families that go through this kind of thing even contemplate staying in their house. The first time I see a malevonent spirit in my house, sayonara house! Still, I recommend the film for a rental, there's a few points in the movie that are tension filled and a few jumps here and there. Should have and could have been scarier though. I give it *** out of *****.

DVD Review: Kung Fu Hustle

I loved this movie. It was exceptionally directed and choreographed. While in theaters, it was being promoed as a comedy, and while there were some funny parts, I thought it was a standout action movie with more martial art ballet than alot of kungfu movies. The plot involves a small town filled with cast-offs and ruffians that lies in the poor section, therefore it's never had problems with the big city gangs that plague the rich section. However, certain events lead to the Ax Gang waging a war on the seemingly helpless people. They find out that they're not so helpless after all and a hero is born from an unlikely place. Like I said, watching the ads for this film had me expecting a Kung Pow type of movie but I was pleasantly surprised. It's beautiful to watch and the ending is touching. I give it ***** out of *****.

DVD Review: Dead and Breakfast

I was chock full of joy when I found out this film finally came out on DVD. I was waiting over a year for it and it looked promising. You can see, on the cover it's touted as being the U.S. answer to Shaun of the Dead. Not by a long shot. Just because a movie is funny and has zombies in it doesn't make it Shaun quality. The fact is, it's not really that funny and it's definitely not scary. But I can't say it's all bad, it's decent in spots, and there were some chuckles here and there (mostly delivered by the Something about Mary-type singer between the scenes). For a B-movie, it has some familiar faces in it. David Carradine, Jeremy Sisto (May), Gina Philips (Jeepers Creepers), Eric Palladino (Strange Frequency) and Portia de Rossi (TV's Arrested Development) in a tiny role. The plot involves a bed and breakfast that is a local bad spot, everyone talks about the strange things going on up there. When a group of young friends, on their way to a wedding, decide to stop for the night, one of the does something bad and unleashes an unearthly evil. The evil will stop at nothing before it turns the entire town into a bunch of wisecracking, dancing zombies. Well shot and well intended, I just didn't feel it delivered on a horror level. I'm going to give it *** out of *****.

CD of the Month (September): Fiend Club Lounge by Misfits Meet The Nutley Brass

This is a must have disc for any Misfits fan. The Nutley Brass have made a brilliant album comprised of their own renditions of 11 classic Misfit tunes. The only complaint is it's way too short at only 21 minutes of playing time. But what a truly inspired 21 minutes it is! It really is surprising to see how layered and complex these old punk rock songs are. Skulls and Teenagers From Mars are true masterpieces that really stand out. This is just a fun disc to listen to, singing the ghoulish lyrics set to horns and piano. I'm telling you, this is a great novelty record, perfect to take the seriousness out of these terrible times we live in, if only for 21 minutes! ***** out of *****.

DVD Review: Snapped

I've been out of commission for a while and THIS is the movie I pick to start reviewing again?! Damn me! A crapper through and through, Snapped is a movie made with a bunch of cast-offs that can't get parts in regular B-movies and they prove it the entire time. Granted, the main character wasn't as bad as the rest of the cast, but she's no Angela Bettis! The plot follows a young woman, who gets hired by a strange art house that specializes in displaying death art. Feeling the need to be the best she can be and prove her doubters wrong, she goes to some extreme measures in the name of her art. All this while dealing with a breakup with her druggie boyfriend, who happens to look like a bad Keanu Reaves impersonator (and who's acting happens to make Keanu's look like Lawrence Olivier!). Pass on this one, the subtitle says it all--You'll be better off Picturing Yourself Dead than watching this stinker. 0 out of *****.

DVD Review: Sleepover Nightmare

Seven years ago, while partying with his friends, a seemingly fine upstanding young citizen loses track of his girlfriend. While he was away getting hamburgers, it turned out she was in the mood for a hotdog, and not his! The clean cut lad goes carayzaay and does a number on the hotdog deliveryman. Then drives his car over the bonfire, oh the humanity! Fast forward to him being transported to a different prison in one of the most secure vehicles around, the Ford Aerostar! While playing around, the driver loses control and the madman is freed! He happens upon a gaggle of twenty-somethings having a party on an isolated estate on the lake. They begin to drop like bored flies in variously lame ways. As crappy as a film I've watched in a while! Very bland and not very entertaining. The house on the lake was the star of this film, that's how bad it was. I wonder what it is about the insane that enables them to have superhuman strength, the silent capabilities of a cat and the dissapearing qualities of Houdini? Maybe it's the straw hat. Sleep through this one. 0 out of *****.