New Trailers for Upcoming Films

Red Eye
http://www.apple.com/trailers/dreamworks/red_eye/

The Island
http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/the_island/international/

High Tension
http://www.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/high_tension/

DVD Review: Goth

I can't believe I just sat through this entire movie. The acting was deplorable, unimaginable, unconstitutional, unreliable, incouragable, and bad. This stinker follows a young goth couple out clubbing, when low and behold, they meet a girl named Goth. By the looks of her, she should have been named Schnozola! Goth turns out to be one tough chick as she kicks anyone's ass she happens to come across. Her goal is to teach the couple what it really means to be goth (If you're wondering what goth is, don't watch this movie). Bad things happen to old women with big saggy boobs in this film, so veiwer (I hope not) beware! If you're constipated and the suppositories or ex-lax aren't getting it done, then I whole-heartedly recommend Goth. If you're regular, then skip it. It gets * out of *****.

DVD Review: Suburban Nightmare

Well, after watching this DVD from Shock-O-Rama Pictures I'd have to say that the goriest thing about this film is it's cover. It was a real surprise to me that this was a Shock-O-Rama picture because it actually had decent acting, writing and cinematography and it didn't have all the hokey effects and gore they are well known for. The film centers around a young married couple who just happen to be serial killers. As their relationship begins to unwind, they're killer tendencies start to pop up, at each other. It's a dialogue driven movie, as there is little action until near the end, but that's ok because even though you signed up for a gorefest, you find yourself wanting to know what's going to happen to these two. The main characters play their parts believably, and deliver some realistic actions and reactions. The film doesn't work as a horror film but does work on a character study level. I give it **1/2 out of *****, would have got ***, but I don't like being fooled by the box art.

Horror/SciFi DVD Releases for 4/12

Suspect Zero
The A-Team: Season Two
Blood Trail
Dead Life
Frog-g-g
Galaxy Rangers: Chained and Pheonix
Goosebumps: How I Got My Shrunken Head
The Hitchhiker Volume 2
Knight Rider: Season Two
Sasquatch Hunters
Shadow Star: Narutaru 1
Space Ghost Coast to Coast: Vols. 1-3
Street Tales of Terror
Teen Titans: Volume 2-Switched

Night Watch Trailer

You've got to check out this trailer from the first movie in an epic horror trilogy coming out of Russia. The film is called Night Watch and it looks insane!

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/night_watch/

Book of the Week: Countdown to Infinite Crisis

I know, I know, it's not a novel, but a comic book. I don't care, this comic has more plot twists and suspense than most novels and it's only 80 pages. 80 heart stopping pages! This is the start off point for a major series of events to happen in the DC universe. The story is going to expand outward over four seperate series of comics. If the series can continue what it started here, boy, it should be killer. I've never been effected by a comic before, but by the end of this one, you'll be left gasping for breath, shocked and saddened all at the same time. Without giving too much away, the story follows the Blue Beetle, the forgotten and underappreciated member of the JLA, as he stumbles across a plan of disastrous proportions that is about to fall upon the heroes. Infinite Crisis is to continue in the series' Day of Vengeance, The O.M.A.C. Project, The Rann/Thanagar War and Villians United. Even if you're not a fan of comics, I'd bet you would be sucked into this story. Get the comic while you can, and hey, it's only a buck! You can't find a better read for less. I give it ***** out of *****. I plan to see this thing through to the end and would like for you to join me.

Cody Banks goes Horror

Frankie Muniz (TV's Malcom in the Middle, Agent Cody Banks) is set to star in a horror film titled Stay Alive. The film centers around a group of teens playing an online horror video game and when their characters die in the game, yep you guessed it, they die in real life as well. Now I know why the current remake trend is so hot.

Tales From The Crypt DVD News

Warner Bros. announced details that they are planning to release season one of HBO's groundbreaking horror series Tales from the Crypt on July 12th of this year. The series began in 1989 and lasted until it's demise in 1996. Over the years, many noteworthy actors and directors contributed to the show. I remember taping every episode so I would have the library, but over the years lost track of all the tapes. Now with it coming out on DVD, it will be easier and less space consuming to revisit some of these great episodes.

CD of the Month(April): 13 Hallowe'ens by Calabrese

Look to the right of the page, see Drac and his buddies rockin' out? That's because they're digging this new disc from "The World's Greatest Horror Rock Band!". My wife got me this disc the other day and I've been listening to it ever since. 13 kick-ass tracks brought to us by the brothers Calabrese, and every song is great, GREAT, I TELL YOU! With so many horror rock acts basically trying to clone The Misfits, it's so refreshing to hear an original sound with ghoulish lyrics and viciously raw music. My wife ordered the disc from their website and it even came wrapped in cobwebs! Everything about this band screams quality. I was truly impressed with the disc quality and packaging. For the independent label Spookshow Records, they really craft a beautiful product, all for ten bucks! The artwork is awesome, the lyrics are printed in the cover and again, the music rocks! I put the band's sticker on my bumper so every one in the South Jersey/Philadelphia area will know that I'm one of Them now. As a matter of fact, after I'm done posting this, I'm running to the local cemetery, I'm going to find the tallest tombstone, then I'm gonna climb that sucker and scream from the top of my lungs..."CALABRESE!...IS THE WORLD'S GREATEST HORROR ROCK BAND!!! YEEAAHHH!!" Hey Dave, Bobby and Jim, you guys did something that has never been done before. You guys break the rating system, ****** out of *****. That's right, 6 out of 5 stars...It's just that ghoulishly great!! Everyone that considers themselves rock and roll fans, not just horror rock should buy this album, the best damn album of the year so far, forget Green Day and all the other posers, Calabrese is the real deal! Click the link to go to the groovy Calabrese website and order already and tell them Dave sent you.

http://www.calabreserock.com/

For Good or Bad, Another Remake

Michael Bay, otherwise known as "I can't find anything original to make, so I'll rehash old favorites" Bay, is apparently trying to get the go ahead to remake, oh I'm sorry, "reimagine" the classic film The Hitcher. Come on, as if anyone other than Rutger Hauer could play that role! New Gen horror queen Jessica Biel is reportedly interested in starring in it.

Bubba Ho-Tep 2!!

Ain't It Cool News is reporting that everyone's wish is coming true! Bubba Ho-Tep 2 is being seriously considered by a few major studios and everything is being hashed out at we speak. The title for the sequel is supposedly going to be Bubba Nosferatu. Bruce Campbell made a joke of the name in earlier interviews, but somewhere along the line it caught hold. I like the name and can't wait for it to be official.

Movie of the Week: Dead Alive

Talk about a classic if there ever was one! Peter Jackson's epic of blood and guts is as enjoyable today as it was when it was released in 1993. This movie paved the way for Shaun of the Dead and other black comedy/horror films ever since. No movie released or ever will be released that can match this film for pure blood spillage and I dare you to find another film where zombies are getting chewed up by a lawnmower...hmm, maybe the Toolbox Murderer could learn some new tricks if he watched this. The story follows Lionel, who catches the eye of a young lady and decides on a date at the local zoo. Lionel's conniving mother follows the duo to the zoo and ultimately gets bit by a ravenous rat monkey. She winds up getting a disease that turns her into the walking dead and despite Lionel's attempts to stop her, she spreads the disease. Before you know it, the place is crawling with the undead. The scene with the judo priest is absolutely hilarious, it should well be regarded as a classic scene of cinematic mastery. The box art is lousy but the movie is great. It gets ***** out of *****.

How Monsturd Was Made!

Here's a cool article that every budding independent filmmaker should read. It tells the story from start to finish how Rick Popko and Dan West made their original film, how they promoted it, got it viewed and eventually got a dealer for it. These guys are truly dedicated to their films. Check out the article, it's very informative.
http://www.camcorderinfo.com/content/caminfo_user_profile_indie_filmakers_rick_popko_dan_west.htm

Horror/SciFi DVD Releases for 4/5

Electra
The Amityville Horror Collection
Aztec 1948 UFO Crash
Camp Fear
Dead Doll
Deep Evil
The Greatest American Hero: Season Two
The Intruder
Mark Of The Witch / The Brides Wore Blood

Electra's the big release this week, but Netflix is sending me Camp Fear...Yahoo!!

DVD Review: Toolbox Murders

Ah yes, Tobe Hooper's triumphant return to horror, eh? Well...no. The director of one of the original scarefests, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, tries to update a movie he made many many moons ago and succeeds in making another run of the mill slasher pic. While I didn't hate the movie, I didn't love it either. I was expecting great things for this one because of all the advanced publicity and reviews. I was a tad disappointed to say the least. The beginning was very slow moving and not until the last 15 minutes did the movie get moving. Angela Bettis was worlds better in May, here, she kind of annoyed me. The story centers on a couple that move into a dilapidated apartment building that houses a secret, a deadly secret, mwa ha ha ha! Neighbors slowly, and I mean slowly, begin to die and eventually we find out what they did with Darkman's costume after that franchise dried up, they loaned it to the Toolbox Murderer! His method of killing is self explanatory and he uses a few good choices. It doesn't however, save this film. The extra's on the disc are few and not special. Sorry Tobe, you get only **1/2 out of *****.

Audio Book Review: Life Expectancy by Dean Koontz

What happened to Dean Koontz? Years ago, he wrote some great horror novels, like Darkfall, Phantoms and Twilight Eyes to name a few of my favorites. For a while there I would pick up a new Koontz book rather than the latest King. Then, I don't know if he found religion or what, but he has recently (over his last 5 or 6 novels) started waxing philosophic about the wonders and beauty of life. I don't mean adding a moral to his story, but totally over-saturating it with his thoughts and beliefs. It drives me insane because he can come up with some great plot lines, but his narratives make me want to kill myself. Also, he could cut the word length by two hundred words if he just cut out his favorite word of all..."nevertheless". That word shows up at least a million times in his last few books. Which brings us to his latest and ultimately his worst novel ever, Life Expectancy. The plot centers around Jimmy Tock, master pastry chef, and his 5 dates of horror as predicted by his grandfather on his deathbed. I listened to the audio version of the book and the John Bedford Lloyd did not help the state of this crappy book. His voices for the characters were laughable and they weren't supposed to be, especially when he does the head aerialist Vigilio. Everything turned for the worst when Koontz removed his middle initial "R" from his name on his books. So please, Dean, put the "R" back, start writing horror again, leave the" life's great" stuff to Chopra, forget the word "nevertheless" exists, remember that people don't crack jokes when they are in life risking situations and we'll be back on good terms. I give this book * out of *****, it really is the worst book I've read (listened to) in about five years.

New Rejects Trailer!

A new trailer for Rob Zombie's upcoming The Devil's Rejects is now available for a glimpse. This is one movie I can't wait to see! Click the link to check it out, and don't forget the tasty fried chicken! It's just so damn good! Bok bok bokok bokbok bok bok!
http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/thedevilsrejects.html

Movie of the Week: Dragonslayer

Although this movie was released in 1981, and the box office take was terrible, it managed to to something that besides Reign of Fire, hasn't been done since. Make a good dragon movie. Despite starring Peter MacNicol, this film shines as an epic fantasy and will always make my top ten fantasy movie list. Granted, the film does seem to plod along in some spots, but as a whole, given the technology at the time, the dragon rocks! When the dragon's chasing the hero out of it's lair, man it doesn't get any better than that! Can i get an Amen?! Like I said, many big budget films made since can't capture this movie's atmosphere nor create as cool a beast. The acting's not so hot here, but it can be forgiven because of the dragon...the dragon. My book of the week was a fantasy novel, so I decided on a fantasy movie to round out the week's picks. I give Dragonslayer **** out of *****.

Book of the Week: Darkwalker on Moonshae by Douglas Niles

This here book is the first one ever to be written under the Forgotten Realms title. This reprinted beauty has an introduction by R. A. Salvatore, and being that I'm a fan of his, I thought to give this one a try. I'm glad I did. Although it starts out a little slow (I even put it down after about 75 pages for a while), the second act picks up pace and slams it home with an action packed 300 pages. I can see how this book inspired Salvatore as both the action and character structures are very similiar. The land of the ffolk is being threatened when the balance of power shifts to the dark side and a great demon is released from the Darkwell. The Goddess must rouse her champions to fight it or risk domination. The demon takes the form of the Iron King and sends his northmen into war against the peaceful ffolk. Only the champions of good, led by an unwieldly hero carrying an ancient sword of heroes and his band defenders can save the land from destruction. Alot more happens in this book, but at the expense of time and space, that's the gist of it. A really good action yarn and I can't wait to get the second in the trilogy. I give it **** out of *****.

DVD Review: The Hazing

Every once in a while you come across a movie that shouldn't be considered good, but ultimately, it turns out to be ok. That happens to be the case with The Hazing. It starts out like any run of the mill B-movie with a group of twentysomethings being set on a treasure hunt for certain items and then they must spend the night in a haunted mansion, all to gain entry into their frat/sorority. The house is rigged by the frats/sors to appear haunted. One of the treasure hunt missions goes awry and Brad Dourif's character (who's very evil) gets critically injured. While he is in the hospital, his spirit wrecks havoc among the coeds at the mansion because they took his evil book. Yeah, I know you're wondering how this could have been passed over by the Oscars, but the film has some enjoyable moments. Dourif is extremely over the top and whoever gets possessed by his spirit acts accordingly. And the makeup on said actors is hilarious, I hope it was meant to be. All in all, not a barnburner but fun nonetheless. I'll give The Hazing *** out of *****.